i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
