So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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