White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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