So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Randomize
