we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
