She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
