I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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