If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I smell like Dick and happiness
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
