hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
