I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
