More tranny stories later!
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
