wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Randomize
