Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
