sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
