I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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