so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I just gift wrapped bread.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
You ruined the universe
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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