Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
