you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
