i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
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