And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
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