No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
