Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
the raccoons are back...
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