we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
