this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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