She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
