Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Randomize
