if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Randomize
