i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Randomize
