I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize