the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize
