I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
are you so shy because you have an std?
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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