I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
