Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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