Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
