is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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