ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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