thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Randomize
