My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
worst night to have a conscience
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize
