I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Randomize
