Kareoke will never be a sober sport
honey bunches of taint.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Randomize