i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
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