I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
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