Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
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