His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
