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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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