ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
If I die, sorry about rent.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Randomize
