I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Randomize
