you traded sex for a burrito?
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
PANTIES FOUND
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
