I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I have demons in me.
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
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