how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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